I went for a walk - the evening darkness was a good place
for invisible tears.
I felt hopeless.
But I remembered a verse I had read that morning.
Today, I do not remember which
but it was something about God's care enduring as long
as the moon was in the heavens.
That evening, in tears, I had cried with God.
And He said He was there.
And I told Him, that however dark the road ahead was
that when I saw the moon, I would never forget
that His love was still there.
I think I knew to say the moon...
since it is more often in the evenings that anger visits.
I promised God that night.
That the moon would be a reminder
between Him and me
that He would never leave me
no matter how rough it got.
And there, out of the grey darkness, the moon shone straight at me
Up high above the earth
above the clouds.
And I remembered the covenant spoken years ago.
I will remember when I see
That You are still here
in the dark.
And I smiled through the invisible tears.
I am not alone.
I may feel hopeless.
I may hurt more than I can express right now.
But I am not alone.
And God will not leave me.
I am loved.
I don't know why He doesn't bang some heads together.
I wish He would.
I wish He would step in and save the day.
And it's been a long, long road since that first promise to God years ago.
But He's still here.
And will be here tomorrow.
I don't know if it gives me hope
but it gives me something to stand on.
I survived yesterday.
Maybe I can survive today
Perhaps even tomorrow.
This is not my forever.
My forever is to be loved by God.
This is just my now.
My now is painful.
But the moon is still in the sky
And I will remember that God still is seeing me.