Sunday, March 15, 2009

If I Could Cut Out Some Tongues....

Sometimes I think it would be better if Christians had no tongues. Better permanently silent than the things they say! Why do we flay up our own and roast them on the fire of our gossip?

This is not about what people are saying about me. I've come to a place where I have a few moments of peace about that, a very few, randomly, occasionally... but...

This is about friend. It is long story, one I haven't got time to throw up on my blog yet. And wondering when I will get that time, and how long a post that would be. Suffice it to say we have living with us a young girl. For awhile. We took her in when she was asked to leave the house. Now, her mother's side is that she was not, she left voluntarily. Either way, she was leaving, and I invited her to come here. She needed people then. I've know her for four years, since highschool. She worked with me, and she would share her life and later on, her problems with me. We often talked, and I heard things that an adult out of the family circle would hear, and I was able to talk into her life. She trusts me to a point, and she came to me for advice and an ear.

She's not perfect. (Haven't found a perfect person yet, though.) She's made mistakes. We've talked about some of them. But, she's trying. I know that about her, both that she's made mistakes and that she is trying to follow God.

But, the accusations now going around at her old church - one we know well and have some association with - are beyond belief. They have a slight basis in truth and are carried to the wild extreme of horrendous, attacking her character, her life, her very value as a human being. I'm still shaking with anger at that. Christians dare to do this - to accuse so strongly with no proof, just hear-say?!

Better we cut our tongues out and are silent. They've destroyed this girl, any chances she has to enter that church again, to be a part of those families. Yes, she has made mistakes. I know that. But not those. And the entire family is dysfunctional. There is not a child in it who is going the right way. And yet the parent is "perfect, a sweet Christian". I'm sorry, but a sweet Christian does not start nor allow such rumors about her child. They don't. God does not do that to us. It is not His way.

And now we are being accused because we dared to associate with someone so horrible as she is.

It hurts. I am already facing quite a bit of accusations of my own. Now I get this added in. But, if I am going to err, I will do it on the side of grace. I will show grace, love, mercy, and compassion. And I see a totally different person than the rumor mill. I see the same person I have for four years - a young girl raised in a home with issues (like most homes - don't we all have issues?) who started off rocky, but has steadily over the last four years walked closer and closer to God and is seeking to follow Him. I hurt for her. The rejection, the accusation, the pain.

All I can do is love. I can love her, welcome her in, laugh with her, and tell her that I like her. Not only do I love her and believe her, I like her. I would love a daughter like her. I can show her that Christians fail and they repent, are forgiven, and are valued and loved. They get back up, their shame taken away, and they go on running their race with their eyes on the goal.

And amazingly, in this home, in my home, we can show her a marriage. Not a perfect one, but a healing one, a strong one. She's been there in my life for four years, so she has been aware there was serious problems, and yet now she can see some serious healing. She's never seen a marriage, never lived in a house with one. That still amazes me. God heals. He heals and He turn around and uses His healing, scarred people to heal others, to show His work.

But pray. I have a feeling the storm is going to break over this girl and all the issues in the church and community, and even in our own team who think we should throw her out and believe the evil being spoken about her. The storm is coming, and we need prayer. Pray for her. Pray for a solution for her and for healing in her heart. It is one thing when the world attacks you and you can take refuge in the church, but when the church attacks you, where do you go?


Sharon said...

I will pray with you and for you. It really is frustrating and painful when the struggles we face are within the family of God. May God give you grace .

Cindy said...

Thank you for your grace and love that is being shown to this 'beloved of God'...

75 days and we are 'around'!

E. T. Tenna said...

Wow. This is tough. Wonderful you've decided to 'err on the side of grace'. You have godly courage. Keep it up. Thanks for sharing. Will pray.