Today, I thought I would have about an hour of two of helping someone else. They had some forms to be filled out, and they asked me to help. I have very neat handwriting and am detailed, so I am good at forms. I went first thing this morning, and had breakfast with them while I started.
Ugh! I hate paperwork. It took so long. I got home at 3:30 this afternoon! I was happy to help. I enjoyed my time with them. They are close friends, coworkers, and like brother and sister to me. With this family, I can talk openly and I have a good relationship. It was good to be there. There had been some issues recently at work, and we could talk through things. At times, all people need to do is talk, and as we talk, we can figure out how to take the principals we learn and learn them in practice, not theory. How to esteem each other. How to deal with conflict. How to handle irritation and anger.
We had a good talk. It helps that I am close to them. I love them like my family and they know that. So, the love that has been shared between us from the time I met them six years ago holds us through conflicts and cultural issues.
And those forms. Page after page of neat, detailed writing. Exact wording and spelling.
I came home both tired and rested. Tired because of the level of attention to detail for hours. Rested because these two who I love dearly always have a way of refreshing my heart. The husband is very similar in temperament to me, and I enjoy talking with him. His wife is different, and she complements him well. I will miss them.
But the "blah" that came after the weekend conference where I felt that no one cares about how things are as long as I do my work is partly lifted. I've struggled since then with an emptiness. Disappointed with God's people. Disappointed with God. Wondering why my prayers are not answered. Wondering why people smile and ask, "How are you?" when they really aren't asking.
This morning was good. Good to be with friends.
I came home a bit frazzled with all I had to do at home. At that stage where all the little things needed doing, but not sure where to start. Not sure all would fit in the suitcases. This evening, I put all the stuff in and was very happy to find out that it fits well and we actually have extra space! Yay!
So the jitters are calming down a little. We will make it. I've got to pack the little bags of things to do, bathroom supplies, and medicine. My daughter is in the tub splashing around and singing "Jesus, thank-you". When she forgets words, she launches into her own... "You'll always be there for me. You'll never, ever gonna leave me. You sent Your Son to die on the cross for me."
And I smile. We're going to make it through the next two days. The stuff will be packed. The house will be at least sort of clean. And we will leave.
Then we start off with a week long rest at a conference where I went to Bible school. Just resting. No speaking, no meeting with supporters. Just rest and relaxing.
I'm ready for it.
I don't know what it is about having my suitcases zipped up that changes my attitude from "I'm here" to "I'm leaving", but it is always the turning point for me in all my moves and trips!