Thursday, June 11, 2009

Better

I like this green better. It's a little bit calmer.

Oh, I had to be part of a team interviewing someone last night.... ok, I'll admit it. I like grammar. There. It's off my chest. This man was sitting there telling me he is strong in English and writing, and I was staring at his letter of introduction and statement of faith and trying, trying so hard to resist putting in commas where he needed them!

So, maybe our team leader is not too far off. I don't think I have a contrary spirit, but perhaps a constructively critical one? :-) I just like grammar and commas.

So, on the more serious side... My husband did come and apologize to his two oldest boys yesterday and that was good. He also apologized to me for the month of silence. That was ok, good even. But not a word about the words in that month that were not silent. The hurtful ones. And the apology was not, like with the boys, followed with a "I love you". So I asked, "Do you love me?" and got this unencouraging answer, "I don't know. It is hard."

I guess... there is a point where my truth-loving side of me says that was a good answer. Truthful. Open. But another side of me screams, "What do you mean you don't know??!!" But, honestly, that is probably how I feel right now, too. I do. I know I do because I have to. Yet how I feel may be very different right now.

But it is step one. All great distances are covered by beginning with one step, so we will accept and appreciate the step of yesterday.

Today's step? Well, - go cover your kid's eyes - I kissed him goodbye when he left. That is all. A small step. So that is two steps now....

Then today also contained an encouraging conversation with a friend. I like encouragement. So I am relatively happy - also because I cleaned my house. I like clean houses, too. Just not my favorite thing to do!

7 comments:

Karis said...

Hmmm... I love grammar too and on a good day, I'm "constructively critical." On the other days, well... hmmm. My husband says I think too fast and remember too many details from a variety of scenarios that I paste together and that contributes to my thinking critically/being critical. And I like encouragement to and someone recently has been very encouraging to me when I've needed it most.

Baby steps including the falls on your butt and the tears...but getting back up.

Cindy said...

You aren't alone on the grammar thing.
I can't read a church bulletin or sermon notes without noting and "judging" when I see mistakes.
I have even been seen with a red pen marking someone's church bulletin...and sorely tempted to mail it back to its editor!!
( I know that is ugly!! )

Cindy said...

ooopsss!!! see I get paid back....
I left out an apostrophe :)

Ellie said...

That is ok. Karis left out an "o" on her "to". That is the problem with being "critical". We also make mistakes. Oops!

And Karis, I am like that, and constantly get in trouble for it. I think too quickly, and I remember far too much. It makes my husband angry that I remember so much and so much detail, but it is not on purpose... I just can't forget things. I even remember movies I've seen ten years ago, and if we put one in, I will sit there able to tell you what will happen next. I'm married to a man who can watch the same movie every night for a week and not remember much of it!

It is all about strengths and weaknesses. The way our minds work have both. I have to learn to appreciate the strengths and be aware of the weaknesses.

Rebecca Conduff Aguirre said...

@Cindy, I looked over your comment and can't see where you missed an apostrophe...if you are talking about "mail it back to ITS editor", you were correct to leave the apostrophe out because the apostrophe is only used when the word short for "it is" and that "its" refers to ownership...see, not the only sticklers for grammar around!!! LOL! :) My eyes just seem to catch spelling/grammar mistakes, I can't help it. :( Lately, the songs projected onto the screen at our church have been bothering me because whoever types them up has little to no clue about the accent marks! It's quite annoying to someone like me...esp. when trying to keep my mind on worship...LOL!

Ellie said...

Becky - yes about worship songs! It bothers me when the grammar is wrong... I try and try to focus on worship, but those mistakes!

Cindy said...

while we are ranting :)
I also get really annoyed by
translation mistakes...I mean Spanish and English...since that is the sum total of my experiences.
There are so many hispanics in our area now...and I have noticed in the stores where they have signs in English and Spanish that often the Spanish is wrong. AND I had noticed in Mexico that same thing...