Hold your Breath and Don't Move - A Quiet Day!

Well, today, up to now, has gone ok so far. Still hoping... well - we did hear that there was another kidnapping, but it was not one of ours, so it doesn't hit quite so close, but we are always aware of our team members who are "in country" right now, and know they are under unbelievable stress.

But, quiet day, busy, but no major incidents. I'll take one of those any day!

Erin - I actually was thinking of a massage the other day. I had one once when we were in Thailand, and oohhh! But tonight, I might try a hot bath without kids asking me questions through the door.

Becky and Beth - ha! My mom taught me early - whether because I had a temper or because she had a lot of housework, I don't know - to find some nasty job that really needs to get done and you hate to do and do that when you are angry instead of beating people up. Yeah, well, my mom had some really clean places in her house! I didn't have much energy today, so I just mopped the floors - it was enough.

That is what I wrote to the pastor's wife later when I wrote her - "I know you did not intend to hurt me, but what I need right now is someone who intends to comfort me." It is at times not enough to have a lack of intent to harm, but we need to intend to comfort. I think it is Isaiah 61 that talks about coming to bind up, comfort, etc. When I work with nursing home patients, I often can not heal, fix, or change anything. But I do have an enormous capacity and opportunity to comfort. There are days I hate my job - but the times when I can bring comfort even for a second or two are worth all the poop I wash up. (sorry, people!)

Yet today did bring good news. My husband phoned and came over this morning to use the vonage phone to do some quick business in regards to another kidnapping - checking in with a few people... Then he stayed and helped get the kids out the door (you have to realize that he has not helped in this task for two years, only criticized my ability to do it.) He asked what he could do, and threw a roast in to slow cook for me. He stopped this morning to say he was sorry for the fight on the weekend with my dad, and said he would talk to him.

He came back in the afternoon because he wanted to talk to me, and again said he was sorry for the way he has been going about things, and said he had a good long talk with my dad and apologized. (This is a man whose apologies in years of marriage I could count on one hand!) We did not get to talk this afternoon.... um, there are four kids running around the house needing to do homework, and there is supper to cook, and things like this....

But he invited me out for supper with him and another couple who are friends of ours tomorrow night. He left early since he didn't sleep last night, and said he wanted me to meet him for lunch tomorrow and he would talk to me then.

So, ladies, keep praying.... it has been a tough month, but I think God is working....I'm just not sure what is with the "kill off a few of my friends along the way" thing, but God is working. And - ya'll should meet me during a normal time - I'm slightly more stable then, and sort of nice. :-) But I'm thankful to have all of you in my life right now.... without you, I'm not sure if I would have been able to keep my head above water at times.

Yay!

(Ok, I confess - I do not like words I am not sure about the spelling of. Slightly OC when it comes to spelling.... how do you spell yay! ? Any ideas?)

But - Hey, good news!

My husband phoned today! Wow! First somewhat civil speech he has had with me in over a month. Well, he came over last night for supper and to visit the kids, but he simply sat on the couch, watched tv, and barely spoke. The kids were disappointed.

But he phoned today!

Our mission has a in-depth program where they pull people off the field and put them into - not only when they are having problems, but simply as a step to going into leadership or simply just because - as a preventative step. They meet with mature Christians trained to work through issues in their lives. My husband has been offered this many times over the years, but he has turned it down. He was simply too busy, or he had no problems, it was just his wife who had problems. Always some reason.

He phoned to say that he has been suggested to go to this again, and he is going to go. Leaving next week. Yay! The first positive step! He was worried about missing a family event that he had said he would be here for this year. No problem! I rescheduled it, one week ahead. No one will mind.

Today, I have a smile on. Good news. Ah! Good news is wonderful. Of course, no program can fix people's hearts. They have to be willing to change, but at least he is putting himself in a place where he can be ministered to. And I believe in God. I believe He can move mountains, speak a world into existence, direct history, and even speak to one stubborn kid of His. I know, because He has changed me, and I still could take a blue ribbon in stubbornness! I've only changed enough to be stubborn about choosing to follow God. Still stubborn. Still hard to change my mind. But my mind is now set to a different leader.

So, celebrate with me! Who know with what.... chips and salsa, a cup of hot chocolate, a run through the park in the wind, whatever you do to celebrate, do a little of it today, and smile up at God. He is working.

And keep praying. He will need it over the next several weeks! Change is tough.