Saturday, August 13, 2011

Validating Listening

Blogging and home leave just don't mix well.  After a day talking to people, the last thing I want is to talk to people... not even to blog.  I run out of energy.  I am a person who recharges by time alone, and home leave has little of that. 

Today has a few minutes of silence.  Two kids in the tub, two out at a job site with my husband.  One of the benefits f having rebuilt our house around us the last several years is that we have developed skills.  A few times, we are able to use those skills and our free time to help friends do projects around the house.  This weekend, we've been pounding up tile, scraping cement, and laying laminate flooring in good friend's house.

But this evening, we also had a meeting.  A supper meeting with people from our church.  Time to again sit and tell the story of last year's adventures with friends from our church.  We've told it three times this week.  Once to a very good friend and a couple who are part of our mission.  That went late into the night - talking as only missionaries can about the details, people we all know, and the real status of life over there.  Then we had two dinner meetings with small groups.

Telling our story...  I'm finding it helpful, even if it is emotional at times.  To have someone listen.  It validates the time, the feelings, the fears, the struggles.  We didn't get that validation in the aftermath of the "adventure", but these chances to slowly tell again and again our story is healing.  Each time we are able to hold more of the feelings and express them.  We are able to come to grips with them.

We are here to thank those who prayed our way through that time, but something interesting is happening.  In their very compassion and concern to know what was going on, they are also helping us through the healing. 

To be listened to... it is a gift.


Carrie said...

I'm glad you are finally getting the listening ears you need! So important!

I'm still looking for someone close to me to listen without doling out advice...

Shan in Japan said...

Amen, what a great gift to be listened to! I am so thankful that you are having this opportunity to be cared for!